Family

This last week I was elated to find a good friend/brother on facebook.  Many of you don't know the story about TJ and my family.  Many of you don't know the story of Jim and Tommy and my family.  Any of you who are not in a police/sheriff's department or fire department also don't know why we call each other family.  So today's topic-family.  An essay by me. :)
One Webster's definition of family is:the basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children; also : any of various social units differing from but regarded as equivalent to the traditional family.  First responders families are anything but traditional.  Growing up, it wasn't uncommon for my dad and mom to be called in for the same call, or at the same time for different reasons.  It also wasn't uncommon for either parent to spend more time with their co-workers than their spouse.  It's the life of a first responder.  They have to be available 24/7, and have to drop their families to save another family.  Growing up I was never jealous, instead regarded my parents as hero's.  Cliche much?  Probably.  But this tight knit community is just that, a community.  We're a family, and always will be.  After mom retired, my sister and I were told by the "old timers" that we were always going to be their family, and we could always call on them if we needed anything.  When I got married, the "old timers" at the SO gave my husband the "if you hurt her, I hurt you" speech.  It's a blessing to have so many uncles and aunts who love you and will always, I mean ALWAYS, look out for you.

I suppose growing up this way made me realize that family isn't always blood.  Family is who you love and care about.  My best friend Mariah and Levin (best friend from high school) are an example of how close friends become extra siblings to you.  This is where Jim and Tommy come in.  I met Jim 12 years ago while skiing.  The Loveland group was kind enough to adopt me into their club, and we instantly became friends.  I'm lucky enough to still call several people from this group friends.  But Jim was different.  As my sister says, he's probably my soul mate, but we would kill each other if we were in any type of a romantic relationship.  We're alike, yet different.  Come college, we spent a lot of our freshman year getting into trouble, when mama H died, my heart broke, because she was my second mama.  He is my brother.  I love him dearly, hate him dearly and everything in between.  His little brother is also my little brother.  There is not, nor ever has been, an physical attraction to him.  He's been a kindred spirit.  Same with Tommy.  Then there's TJ.  When my sister and parents went to the Bahama's in high school, they quickly formed a bond with TJ.  Sort of adopted him unofficially.  I haven't talked to him in years, so finding him and his wife on facebook was great.  At the end of the day, I love all three of these boys (and wives) as if they were my brothers (and sister's in law). 

There is no boundry to family.  With that said though, just because some one is a blood relative, does not mean they are family.  My husband, father and I argue this more than we should.  I have relatives I do not consider my family.  I don't love them like I do my family, nor do I confide in them like I do my family.  I'm sure some of you are reading this thinking "what a bitch" or "I wonder if she's talking about me."  I'm not going to make a list of my family, because that is something that is inappropriate and hurtful.  But I hope by reading this, you will understand a little of where I come from.  When I say Madysen had many uncles who love her, I truly mean many uncles.  I have one blood sister, my best friend, the one who knows all my baggage.  But Mariah, and some day, Melissa, are also my sisters, and aunts to Madysen.  Having non blood relatives as aunts and uncles does not adulterate the meaning behind aunts and uncles.  I think it strengthens the meaning.   

So I challenge you, who do you consider family?  What are your takes on family?